Bagels and Cream Cheese

One of the joys Chrissy and I shared, especially when our girls were of preschool age and half day kindergarten, was enjoying a cup of coffee and eating our bagels while our girls played. (it wasn't all work and no fun as stay home moms....we had our pleasures, too)  Her favorite morning indulgence was a seseme seed bagel toasted, a smear of butter topped with a smear of cream cheese.  Mmmmmmmmmm, was it so tasty on a crisp fall day like today.  How I relished those conversations that only a sister could appreciate.  Often we would talk of our spouses: how we loved them and wanted to kill them at the same time.   All in jest of course, as we know sometimes men and women are on different wave lengths.  She would share her love of Frank and dog him at the same time, just as I would of Marty.  We supported each other on our journeys of motherhood and marriage.  We would talk of our lives, laugh, share family secrets and stories, and correct our girls if they were getting into mischief.......and all was good.  I thank God for those times of simple pleasures; yet, I know I was so blessed.  Many a days "onlookers".....other moms......would express their envy of the relationship we had.

I try so very hard to stay in the moment these days of grief, appreciate my family and our blessed times.  It's difficult not to look back and miss those other times that are now in the past.  It's not productive to look back and long for those times again.....even though I have......as I'm a sister and a human being.  I try not to look to the future, but there are days when I do.....and I have to talk myself back to now.  Now is what we have to live because there is no control over the past or the future and not even now.  That much I have learned in this life. 

When I feel the crisp fall air and see the gorgeous colors as I do this morning, I can't help but think of those warm coffees and bagels smeared with our indulgences.  That experience sustains me now as I will never forget them.  I try not to linger there too long, but I wil never forget.  How blessed I am to have had those times because a sister relationship is like no other.  For now I have my coffee and an egg sandwich.  It is different but just as good.  I will live with it for today, and perhaps she is still having her coffee, bagels and cream cheese but in a new light, with all those that have gone before us.  Imagine how it must taste!

Savor those blessed moments of your life and be grateful for the experience