This day has rolled around again.....it's been 3 years since the passing of my little sister, Chrissy. It's not an easy day, but all the days inbetween aren't easy either. But this day is a poignant reminder of what happened in this month, her journey through life, and the heart wrenching days just before her last breaths. It's so permanent; it's here to stay. I look back and wish I would have changed a few things. I was strong in her eyes, but I was so vulnerable inside. I wish I had shown her my tears, I wish I could have said "good-bye", but I couldn't. I always had hope until the very last moment. Hope that my miracle would show itself, but that was not the plan. I curse His plan sometimes because it hurts. All that's lost and never meant to happen hurts. I'm trying to be a Big Girl, sissy, but it's so hard. I can't seem to hold back my tears, but I must try. The little ones look to us for guidance and strength.
It's been three years, and I've grown and learned a lot. I am able to laugh and sing at certain times, and sometimes I'm not. But isn't that life? Sometimes the fog and clouds move in and sometimes the sun appears. I still think of you everyday of my life, and the kids still ask about you. We haven't forgotten. Others may have, but I never will. life is a journey. We live.....we live on....but we'll never forget and we'll never stop missing you!
Love, hope and peace to you my heavenly sister......
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